I have some good news and some bad news. The bad news is that I will be writing about our school’s parking problems again. The good news is that this should be the last time I ever have to write about it. Even if this decision only lasts a few months, I will be gone from this campus, and I will never have to deal with this banal ineptitude with parking spaces.

Over the past year, I have mentioned how our faculty senate made parking the biggest mountain out of a mole hill situation I can remember. Honestly, I don’t know why this is even an issue. This school has lost over 1,500 students in the last decade. The school is running at 40% capacity. How on earth are people dissatisfied with parking? How is there even a struggle with finding a spot? I am writing this on a weekday afternoon, and as I look out at my building’s parking lot, there are 6 vehicles. Our lot has 50 spots, and I have never had a problem parking. Granted, I show up on campus just as the night staff is leaving, but I have no trouble making this work.

The only thing I can gather is that students are taking up spots closer to the buildings before the professors can get there. If anything, this is a superficial problem. All the faculty need to do is show up a little bit early to their classes to beat the students for the spots. That way, they can properly prepare for their lectures and have things ready before they walk into the classroom. It may sound heretical, but maybe come to work.

This isn’t rocket science, but we darn sure think that it is around here. Recently, an all-campus email was sent announcing the new parking policy. We now have white spaces for general parking, blue spaces for faculty, and yellow spaces for facilities. In theory, this all sounds fine. However, there is just one problem. The handicap accessible parking. I will let the picture below explain.

This could potentially lead to some bigger problems. I don’t know all the aspects of the Americans with Disabilities Act, but I am pretty sure there is an issue with this. After they painted the new lines, they didn’t even bother updating the old lines. I am not even going to mention this on my way out, but I am pretty sure it will bite somebody in the butt before long. It never ceases to amaze me what a bunch of people with fancy pieces of paper can do when they put their minds toward something, and it usually goes poorly.