There is a sketch from Saturday Night Live in which a football player, played by John Cena, is taking his final exam in a science class. While the other students present work appropriate to the course, Cena has several bananas nailed to a piece of wood. He then describes his “findings” to the science faculty panel in a humorous way that stereotypes the “college jock” as determined to learn but able to offer only simple responses.

The faculty panel asks seemingly challenging questions of the other students about their projects, and shuns them for not knowing the answers. Meanwhile, the faculty asks Cena for the name of the banana’s outer skin. When Cena answers, “the crust,” the faculty laud him for his brilliance. At the end, Cena receives a perfect score while the other students barely scrape by with a C.

Throughout the sketch, it is clear that the faculty panel is on the side of the football player. This favoritism stems mainly from Cena stating that he will not play in the championship game unless he receives an A+ on all his exams. The other students are stunned at the blatant favoritism shown by the faculty. In case the point isn’t clear, the faculty are wearing sports paraphernalia, and one of them has face paint in the school’s colors.

While this may seem like a funny, farcical sketch about how the school wants to win a championship so badly that the faculty are willing to lower standards, it offers insight into the current state of college education. I am not going to get into NIL entanglements because that is way beyond my paygrade. However, I do want to talk about the view of athletics over academia.

The SNL sketch revisits an old trope that still irks me, which is why I chose the title of this article. Athletics gets the spotlight on college campuses, while academic achievement hardly gets a mention beyond the school’s social media, if that. It never ceases to amaze me how much money goes towards athletics, specifically in the Power 5 conferences. The locker rooms of some clubs rival or even exceed NFL facilities. Meanwhile, campus classroom facilities suffer from neglect.

I am well aware that funding for campus facilities comes from different sources of revenue, but my beef is not about the money. Besides, boosters and alum can do whatever they want with their money. My discontent comes from the treatment of athletics on campus more than anything else, especially here at Romulus University. Our student body may as well comprise 115% student-athletes, since the vast majority of incoming students enroll for athletic opportunities. It may not be that high, but the fact remains that well over half, or even two-thirds, of our students are involved in athletics.

When the balance is off kilter as much as this, it can lead to several problems. First, student engagement in non-athletic extracurricular activities plummets when there are that many students in sports. Attendance at campus events is poor because athletes are either too busy or too tired. Lack of participation leads to a lack of interest on the part of students and the hosts. Who wants to put effort into something knowing that nobody is going to show up? It is disheartening.

Furthermore, the amount of leeway the athletic department has here at Romulus is infuriating. Just like in the SNL sketch, Cena’s coach steps in to remind the panel that his player has practice at 3, to which the panel hustles through the exam to accommodate Cena. We have a similar problem at Romulus. Our academics take a back seat to athletics. Maybe if our school’s teams were any good, I might find it excusable. Actually, even if these kids had astounding talent to win conference championships, I still would hold this mentality in contempt.

We receive reminders to wrap up our classes by 3 in the afternoon so students can make it to practice. I have no interest in such nonsense. I will teach to the extent of the class schedule. I don’t care what the coach thinks needs to happen. In fact, I know a couple of coaches who intentionally schedule training and practice to conflict with class times. Half the time, I want to say that bending the knee to the athletics department is detrimental to the student body. However, I know that Romulus would go bankrupt if the recruiters weren’t out there scooping up these kids.  I don’t know why this concerns me so much anymore. I am on my way out. If this school sinks after I am gone, I won’t shed a tear. That doesn’t sound nice, but when I see where the priorities lie around here, all I can see is shades of Remus coming through, and that is never a good sign.