I am writing this while I am still waiting for a potential gig to offer me a contract. As of now, none of the places I visited has sent me any notice regarding the job I applied for at their institution. As far as I am concerned, this is a bizarre way to run the hiring process.

I understand that academia is notorious for moving slower than molasses on a cold winter’s morning in North Dakota, but this waiting thing is getting on my nerves. I am probably spoiled by the fact that when I got my job offer at Romulus, I still had some time left at Remus before graduation.

I am a little disappointed that the institutions I visited way back in February have yet to say anything. As much as I have heard my whole life about the need to extend professional courtesy, none of the institutions I interviewed with or visited on campus have notified me of anything. Are they afraid to tell me that they are no longer interested in my services? I understand that most places will not notify anybody about a negative outcome until a contract is accepted, but this is a little ridiculous. The places where I only had interviews, I am willing to give a little more leeway because they interview a bunch of people and lose them in the shuffle.

However, the places where I visited and do not have the common decency to contact me are more than disheartening. They remind me of dogs who know they are in trouble and look away in the hopes that you will disappear. I hate to break it to you, Rover, I am still looking for an answer, not because I really want to hear a denial, but because I know you have enough courtesy to let me know that things aren’t working and that we should start seeing other people.

This kind of silence is the sort of thing that teenagers (and apparently more adults lately), in their awkwardness, do when they don’t have the heart to break the news that they don’t have any interest in you anymore. Are we all afraid of confrontation in any way, shape, or form at this point? It shouldn’t be this hard. Even the schools where I didn’t get an interview at least told me at some point that they offered the job to someone else. I promise you, I will not bite or burn your school down. Just have the courage and character to tell me.

P.S. I am well aware of websites that keep tabs on committee progress, but they don’t update very often, or at least to my liking.